The Parenting Children Course

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Just in time 'husbanding' and 'fathering'

I made a comment last meeting that I appreciated all those who emailed or sms me that they cannot make it for the Fathers Club (FC) meeting. They apologized for not being able to make it and with legitimate reasons too. Two common reasons were:

1. Been very busy with work and realize that he has not been spending enough time with his wife. He should therefore make time for her and hence the Saturday absence from FC's meeting for that weekend.
2. Been very busy with work and realize that he has not been spending enough time with his children. Hence the same reason for the absence.

I commended the men for making that commitment for their family (absent from FC to be with their loved ones) and I encouraged them to do so. This is really what FC is all about - encouraging men to be committed to their families.

However, this speaks a lot too about the lifestyle we are living, that we are not balancing or juggling them too well! This is akin to cramming last minute for our examination and the feeling of being overwhelmed and overanxious.

Do we do the same for our family? I shared that no matter how busy I am, I am committed to be at Fathers Club, and I will be there. It helps that I am the person in charge. :) I have to be there! But that is good for me.

I challenge the men to calendar in (if there's such a verb!) their essential events that they need to be committed to. If FC is important, then it is in the calendar. If our families are important, then it is in the same calendar. Work will always be there whether we calendar it in or not. When we are juggling them well with the planned calendar as our conscience and guide, then there should be no last minute cramming in our relationship.

Notice Jesus was never in a hurry. He seems to have time for ministry, time to withdraw, time to feast, time to build friendship, time for the lonely and rejected people and time most of all for His Father. He's never caught in the "Russian trap" (I mean, "rushing" people). He has time for everything, even ultimately for the Cross!

FC will be our conscience because it reminds us that if we don't make time to learn with others and be accountable to each other in our roles as men, husbands and fathers, then we will continually to be trapped in what is the norm of our world today.

So let's learn to avoid last minute cramming for what's important in our lives!